Summertime and Rebirth

 

Summer is finally here to remind us that the sun is always shining – even when we don’t see it!

 

Somedays, it is normal to feel like you still have to move mountains – and not finding the will, or like the hills on your path are way too steep and rocky. Changes take long sometimes, and I also wish it were different.

 

My disability process is still running after more than years now, and, somehow, I have it as a milestone to move on to my new me.

 

My mom tells me to look at nature to see God and listen to His lessons. The variety of animals with different skills, the beautiful sculpture of each flower, the length and order of the seasons, the discipline of the birds, the fact that after a long night, there is always a new day. All of that makes me think.

 

I look at my backyard, and I see God’s different messages. The sun-loving deciduous trees shed their teeth during the wintertime and go to a semi-death state. I look at them and only see the trunk—no life, no green, no beauty during the cold season.

 

Are they teaching me a message of hope at the beginning of Spring, when tiny buds start to pop everywhere in a matter of weeks, and a dead tree becomes a piece of art, with new colors, different shapes, talking to the wind as the breeze touches their hair?

 

I want to be like them, but not always. I want to reborn, but not going through the self-reflection, inward, dead period every year because it’s painful and scary. But is it possible to skip this process and continue to grow? I am not sure.

 

It is now summertime here in Oregon, but I still feel my inner winter. I keep looking for the beauty and life of my bare trunk and getting more vital to hold the ground as big trees do.

 

One day at a time. One season at a time. Patience is the essence. I am not there yet. How are you?

 

 

 

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