On my last blog in December, The Time in Now, I wrote about closing 2019, and my 2020 goal to start a project called 20|20: Eyes On Me.
Last year was a crazy roller coaster ride for me. I had to learn to adjust my daily habits. I put a brake on my career. I changed doctors. I had to find hope and peace inside of me, amid chaos.
It was good to say goodbye to 2019. That door is now closed, and a new chapter is yet to be written by me – and each one of us has a clean slate to start from.
Nevertheless, there were meaningful things last year.
Self-awareness and meditation were instrumental in bearing my physical pain, and developing a mindfulness practice helped me better understand my fear while balancing my health.
I relied on a lot of loving people and got help from different sources to be able to stand up tall and continue my journey.
While my goal with the Project 20|20:Eyes on Me is to go more in-depth on my self-reflection practice and embed more mindfulness during the next 52 weeks, I will continue to publish in tandem this weekly blog that talks about my experiences living with lupus.
First Things First
This week, on this 2020 opening blog, I want to say thank you to all the people who supported me these past 12 months. Many doctors, family members, friends, teachers, healers, organizations, books, and life stories left a positive mark on my soul.
I also want to recognize the learning opportunities life posed to me that got me out of my comfort zone. Unforeseen situations made me face the unknown, and I had to learn to control my fear and emotions to continue to move forward.
We talk many times about a ‘new year, new me’, but the way I am looking at it is more a continuation of where I ended. I want to leverage all the badges and scars I got. All the wrinkles are part of who I am today and tell my story. I want to use them in the best possible way in my future, and I hope to do not make the same mistakes I did before.
For me, this first week of the year is an opportunity to be grateful and acknowledge my tool kit. I am thankful for becoming stronger and more vulnerable. I didn’t believe I could combine these two characteristics inside of me.
I am not sure what this new year will bring. I mean, in my head, it’s still a brand new book, with blank pages. I am curious to see what secrets life will unveil this time around as I continue my journey to reframe my identity.
To be able to receive the blessings this year, I need to let go of the past and be grateful for what is. If you had not had a chance to read the Harvard Medical School paper about Gratitude ( Giving Thanks Can Make You Happier ), it is worth the time.
I Have a Dream
This year, I want to increase my confidence in my truth and my power, believe in my imperfect beauty, embrace my flaws with pride and honor. I want to be open to new adventures, and help others as I have been helped, I want to learn to love unconditionally and adopt the qualities I admire in others. To give more, and ask for less.
I want to have the superpower of bringing hope, and help others find a smile where before there was a tear. I believe we are all here for a reason, which is to help one another.
May we all embrace 2020 as a newborn. A new creature full of life that has all the possibilities ahead. Because this is what it is.
What about creating your own gratitude list? Download the template I added below and start smiling now! Happy New Year!