I am a Scorpio. I know this sign comes with the stigma of being dominant, very sensitive, critical, and passionate. Above all, I see myself as an intense person.
I am never comfortable settling for an average result. When I aim something, I am all in to win.
That comes with an extra-weight of self-pressure, high expectations, and a need to control every tiny bit of the situation. I naturally focus on what can be improved instead of celebrating what has been done right.
Until lupus came uninvited.
About 6 years ago, near my birthday, I felt the weight of the word lupus for the first time. The bundle that it brings combines muscle and joint pain, the feeling of impotence, exhaustion, and above all, frustration.
I am so used to live the present moment, that some times I forget to focus on what is critical instead of what is urgent. The day-to-day habit and challenges can quickly fill up my hours, and I overlook the right things to spend my energy on.
This week, I was talking to a friend of mine whose mom was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer. This came as a surprise for her family who lives in Asia, and suddenly this girl who is based in the States, had to make a last-minute decision: stay here with her son and husband or fly back to her home country to be with her mom, not knowing when she can return.